Monday, July 7, 2008

MultiVocational Vacations...NOT

Balance is the trick but it may not really exists, at least not in a linear form. For sure, the cycle time for restoring balance is difficult for me to handle these days. As the scales tip from one side to the other, it seems to take a LONG time to correct. That is a dangerous cycle, that means I need to make, more, smaller corrections.. instead of the big ones.. OR DO I?

Just like many artists, I am forced to maintain a "day job" to sustain my family. Our world doesn't value classical artists even when they value the art. We are just the entertainment for the week in most cases. Certainly not worth, paying for... when movies, and HD TV are available. (sorry that is a whole other tangent)

I have used my vacation time for performing in the past few years but that has put me into a dilemma. I don't ever seem to get a vacation. My recharge time is extremely limited and in the past months, it seems to take me longer and longer to switch gears between "vocational" committments.

Perhaps, I am rekindling my passion for performance.
Perhaps, my job at C1 is more demanding and bleeds into my personal life.
Perhaps, the demands of my family are growing as the kids get older
Perhaps, I am not adjusting the time "blend/ballast" fast enough to stay afloat.
Perhaps, I want to do more and more at my church and I feel guilty about my lack of time.
Perhaps, I need to refine my goals, and only apply my time against the high value targets.

Perhaps, I am not so different from anyone else out there
Perhaps, I over-intellectualize everything
Perhaps, I am just naive as I actually think I can control and manage this mess.
Perhaps, I need to just sing.
Perhaps, I really am as scattered as I fear... Don't tell anyone ;-)
Perhaps MULTIVOCATIONAL=SCATTERBRAINED in the end no matter the person...

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